How does REAL learning occur?
Oftentimes, when we want children to learn something or try something new, we encourage them by saying, “Try this! Do this!” We can be insistent on the outcome and when doing so, we can miss key components that are foundational for learning.
** Before asking a child to do something or learn a skill, always reflect on why you are asking this of them. Is it to encourage safety (i.e. looking both ways before crossing a street, wearing a seatbelt, etc.)? Is it to foster health (i.e. drinking adequate water can be good for our bodies)? Is it to encourage healthy social dynamics (i.e. asking to use something before grabbing it from someone else unexpectedly)? Whatever the reason is - oftentimes explaining the why behind the direction will allow for more cooperation from the child. More on this soon!
What are the best “conditions” or environmental setup to foster real learning? Is it encouraging them to do something or behave in a way that we want? Or, is it providing the best conditions for true learning to occur - from the “inside out.” When the child makes a decision in that moment to try something by their own accord, to take the next step - that is true learning - when the choice comes from within. And how do we foster that?
We make learning experiences fun and playful. We show them the way - we model doing the same thing we are encouraging them to do. We focus more on the process of learning and exploring rather than the exact skill we are looking to see in that moment.
When children are less stressed on the need to perform in some capacity, while enjoying and having fun with the process, that is when real learning occurs. That is when they are more inclined to take that next step - not because we told them or made them do so, but because they felt safe and wanted to do so.
A great example of this was in a recent feeding session I was doing. The child is hesitant to try pureed foods. Instead of saying “eat this, try this!”, we showed her that we could have fun exploring the foods and were not insistent on a particular outcome. What happened instead? The child tried the foods! And was comfortable and regulated doing so. Sometimes, just participating in some capacity in an activity that was previously avoided is a huge step forward.
Check out our Coping Skills & Positive Self-talk PDF for in-the-moment phrases to help children build confidence while working through challenging experiences!